So, I'm sitting here with matociqula; we're both working on our respective tasks. Mine is composing the nuts-and-bolts detail for our next year's federal funding applications. I finished putting together Hartford Adult Education -- school #13 of 17 that are getting tech refreshes next year -- and took a peak at the project total.

I'm up to $1.9M, which prompted me to do a brief victory dance, 'cause the two million mark is in sight. Then I said to eBear "I suppose I shouldn't be so cheerful about spending the peoples' money." She said "go on, spend the peoples' money." I said "spend the peoples' money," then "spank the peoples' monkey." Which elicited "that's a lot of monkey."

Sure enough, the calculator damn near leaped into my hand.

Hmm, 300,000,000 Americans, half of who are male, gives us 150,000,000 Americans with a monkey to spank.
Assume the average monkey is 6.5" inches long.
That's a really big number, howzabout we express that in miles...

Giving us 184,659 miles of the peoples' monkey to spank.

eBear informs me that's 3/4 of the way to the moon. ...Which makes me think of Ronald Reagan and his national debt expressed as a stack of dollar bills rising into the stratosphere from the depths of the grand canyon. "All of the statistical average erections in the U.S. stacked one on top of the other would reach 75% of the way to the moon. If all the men lie and claim 8" boners, that gets you clear to old luna."

There's something really broken inside my head.